Want to "star" in reality TV? Sign up to give your baby up

Lorraine

Decry the adoption culture all day long, but from the Adoption Option (see sidebar) to a casual comment the other evening about adopting a child instead of raising a chimp in one's home (who later goes berserk and chews up a neighbor's face), it's with us everywhere. Today's New York Times has a story about gay adoption and how it is on the rise. That story featured Matt and Ray Lees of Worthington, Ohio, who adopted eight

children between then, a seven-month old infant (presumably from the U.S.) two children from Haiti; and five siblings of a drug-addicted mother who could not care for them. We wish we knew more about the infant and the Haitian adoptions; but we do not. 

As for adopting five siblings from a mother who can't care for them, we say, good job. Without question, these men, who are white, are adopting black children in need of stable homes with regular meals and parental love and guidance. And the fact that they are keeping the siblings together is another boon. It can't be easy to find a home for five siblings. I mention the race issue here, because that undoubtedly raised the degree of difficulty of finding homes for these kids.

Because the siblings were born after 1996, they will be able to access their original birth certificates if they were born in Ohio. Their ages are not given, but from the photo, at least some of them are old enough to remember their other and retain a connection to her if possible.

The story also states that there are 115,000 adoptable children hoping for homes in the United States. Let us assume these are not children being produced to feed the adoption market, or that their mothers were coerced into giving up their children; these are kids in real need. But these adoptions are not the sexy stories that make good TV.

From a commenter, Cedar, today we learned that a production company called "Pop Management Entertainment" is conducting a national search for pregnant women who are considering placing their child up for adoption. Supposedly, "this ground-breaking documentary" will tell the story from the point of view of young expecting BIRTH mothers who are at a crossroads, facing the most important decision of their lives..." (emphasis ours) apparently we become birth mothers as soon as it crosses our minds that adoption might be necessary.

You can sign up to be a "star" on the upcoming show--the online form actually asks if you want to be the "star" in this drama or just a "fan." That's as far as I got before I wanted to throw my computer across the floor and shoot the producer. As we know from other shows such as Sixteen and Pregnant, the possibility of appearing on one of these shows had led girls to get pregnant in the hope of being chosen*

What is so objectionable about shows like this is that they will undoubtedly encourage young, impressionable, needy teens and young women to give up their babies because they feel they have no choice once they "committed" to the contract of going through with it; even if the contract signed during the weeks beforehand doesn't include that they "must" go through with the adoption, the emotional coercion will be intense. They will not want to disappoint their "friends" and "reality star" makers, the producers. --lorraine

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PS : *Adoption, It Seems, Is Everywhere, coming to a screen near you
and 16 and Pregnant encourages the teen-mom trend 
and JUNO COMES TO REALITY TV: 16 AND PREGNANT PREMIERES ON MTV

A blog post from First Mother Forum ( Surrogate Mother Wins Right to Sue for Custody) is included in the book above: Child Custody (Opposing Viewpoints).

PPS: Hand still in recovery, but therapy evaluation is still a week off.